


no time to die

by septiceyesweetheart



Category: Sonic the Hedgehog (IDW Comics), Sonic the Hedgehog - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, This was supposed to be comforting, Unresolved Emotional Tension, but i literally cannot find a way to comfort in a way that stays tru to the charries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-24
Updated: 2020-02-24
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:49:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22876582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/septiceyesweetheart/pseuds/septiceyesweetheart
Summary: you know when you spiral and have a meltdown when you're alone and in that moment you want someone to talk to but uuuuuhhhhhhh
Kudos: 42





	no time to die

he needed to put on a brave face, despite being a few steps (or lack thereof) away from losing himself completely. he had been very good - no,  _ amazing  _ \- at keeping it together. he kept reminding himself of the past troubles he survived to get through this one, and man has he gone through some shit. he's been through  _ a lot  _ of shit. but this… this was a lot on its own.

he needed to put on a brave face because tails was so busy trying to find a cure. because amy was scraping up new locations to safely move the survivors to. because seeing cream lose her optimism was so heartbreaking. because hearing whisper's wails was devastating. there was no room or time to boost morale.

and that's fine. there was no time for feeling sorry for yourself, no time for wishful thinking. that doesn't solve anything. it doesn't. because there's no time to die either. 

running was the one thing that kept sonic's mind quiet. nowadays, his brain wouldn't shut up. all he was thinking of was how much all of this sucked. yes, he's been through other shit. but at least he when he was a werehog he was still himself!

sonic had to put on a brave face, but he was the one who was inches from losing himself.  _ literally.  _ it was safe to say that he was one of the few who was allowed to get lost in wallowing and self pity. he was the only one who was infected and still able to tell the tale, while a whole load of his friends could not. none of sonic's friends could survive the way he did.

but what was the point of surviving if his friends wouldn't be there with him?

tears leaked from the corners of his eyes as he sped through the field under the stars, the drops streaming across the sides of his face. normally, sonic would pick up the pace, get it out of his system in a way he knew how. but his body was so exhausted, way past its limit. he usually ran faster to avoid the ache in his chest and focus on the wind, but he physically could not go any faster. he was lucky enough to get the infection to calm down again.

the slower his steps got, the heavier the tears became. his face scrunched up in anguish as he paused his movements for a second. but it was only a second before he fell to his knees and let the ache in his chest seep deep into his bones.

_ he couldn't protect his friends, and he can't now. it's unbearable.  _

of course, sonic got back up again. he had no choice. the heaviness of his heart was begging him to stay on the ground, or was that just the constant feeling of wanting to collapse? he wanted to stay on the ground, but he wanted to be around someone even more. anyone, really.

well… not just anyone. cream and whisper were obviously out of the question. espio was dealing with his own losses. tails? no, that's sonic's little brother. he can't bear the burden.

clearly, this wasn't going to be easy, no matter who he chose to go to. nothing about this easy. when was his life ever easy?

he got back to the shuttle, exhaling deeply. he looked down at his body, making sure he didn't accidentally go full zombot on the way back. he went inside, bracing himself for any new updates on this absolute shithole of a situation.

just about everyone was asleep. everyone except…  _ amy.  _ she was sat on the floor, surrounded by papers, maps, strategies… looked like she couldn't sleep.

sonic couldn't really afford to sleep either… so he sat some distance from her.

amy managed a smile of acknowledgment, but didn't say anything. obviously too busy focusing on the task at hand. he knew she would listen though. she was good at that.

the only thing is, the sting in his throat was gone, and the ache in his chest had subsided. he really didn't feel like cracking that open again, not that he could if he tried. but the whole thing was still gnawing at his brain. it was going to come out one way or another. maybe the pain of this would eat him alive before the virus does.

"so," he began.

"so…" amy repeated, not looking up from her important papers.

sonic didn't know what else to say. everything he was thinking about earlier didn't seem like such a huge deal anymore. besides, amy was trying to find yet another location to pick up refugees, and  _ another  _ safe place to take them to. there was no time for self pity, no time for dying, but sonic knew he had to get this out somehow.

"this shit blows, huh?"

"yeah, no kidding."

**Author's Note:**

> i keep writing sonic things oopsies


End file.
